Emma Grace Poquette Literally Ruins Everything

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Emma Grace Poquette Literally Ruins Everything

Emma Grace Poquette, Staff Writer

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Man, Emma Grace Poquette literally ruins everything at Canton Academy. First Poquette ruined snacks in Mrs. Warren’s class taking away the food privileges. Poquette has also apparently ruined football, homecoming, Marcus Goodloe’s life, Nora Smith’s hope for humanity, and many more things.

It was a dark and dreary day here at CA when Poquette made the drastic decision to eat some hot chips. Poquette did not feel like picking up her trash and decided to just leave junk all around the classroom. Mrs Warren was fed up with this behavior so she decided to ban all food and drinks in her class and  gave Poquette a verbal warning so maybe she would change her ways, which unfortunately never happened. Jake Jurney has also suffered from the Poquettes presence.

In addition to those terrible choices, Jake Jurney says that Poquette has ruined their football season by just showing up to the games. Jurney says that the football team is losing games when Poquette is loud, distracting. When Poquette is cheering she apparently messes up the football players while they are playing and leaves the team in anger because of their disappointing season.  Even homecoming was ruined by Poquettes decision to come.

On this cold fun-filled night, homecoming was ruined once Poquette walked through the door. When people saw her walk in  they all decided to leave once they knew what was about to go down; which was her ruining homecoming. Poquette tried to dance with other peoples dates which made the girls mad so they stormed off and left the dance. Poquette also photobombed all of the dates pictures and was tagged in all of their Instagram posts but wasn’t tagged by her name…she started a new hashtag. This hashtag was called, “thegirlwholiterallyruinseverything”. The appearance of Poquette also makes Marcus Goodloe want to run away and cry.

It was just an ordinary day in the classroom when Poquette and Goodloe started to get into an argument about volleyball. Goodloe became frustrated when Poquette started speaking facts and spiraled into a tantrum telling her she ruins everything. Goodloe then engaged in a verbal debate with former sophomore, Collin Gray, that took up the time of the entire class period. Nora Smith adds on to the despisal of Poquette by saying that she wants to throw up due to Poquette’s existence.

Smith dreads walking through CA’s hallways because everywhere she looks she sees Poquette and gets a weird feeling in her gut that makes her want to get sick. Smith says that every statement that Poquette implies is a false statement and an unreasonable thing to say. Poquette likes to get on Smiths nerves and drive her insane. Poquette spilled her drink all over Smith in the cafeteria which made Smith have a heated situation. Smith then yells at the top of her lungs, “Emma Grace why do you have to ruin everything!!!!!!” Poquette has then realized that nobody likes her and that she has to learn to have only a few friends and not be considered “popular”.